Forget
by Haylis
Summary: Takes place right after 2x15 "Revelations". Morgan appears on Reid's doorstep to tell him something. Reid tells him something in return.


Note: Not really sure about this one, but I'm glad I finished it. I might make a sequal at some point, but for now it's a one-shot. Btw., this story can also be found on my livejournal account 'ildoza'. Enjoy! :)

**Forget**

_"If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything."_

Morgan arrives at Reid's just before midnight. He has to tell him. He promised himself that, when Reid was still trapped in a chair at a cemetery, and…_ dying_… that if he ever got the chance, he would. Because god damnit, Spencer Reid is not allowed to die, and god damnit, he will never forgive himself if he doesn't at least tell Spencer.

A promise is a promise. That's what he keeps telling himself as he stands in front of Reid's apartment and frustrated rings the doorbell for the third time. That, and the fact that he, Derek Morgan, is _not_ a coward.

Besides, he can't stand the thought of the kid being alone. Not right now, and actually, not ever.

After two more rings at the doorbell (and the time during those two rings is one of the worst moments of Derek's life, because _why the hell doesn't Reid answer his door?_) Spencer opens.

"Why the hell did it take you so long to answer?" It's not his intention to sound angry, but for a moment… It was stupid of course, because the statistics – and Morgan is sure Reid can tell him those – of someone being kidnapped twice, let alone twice in the same day can't be anything else than microscopic small. Smaller than the chance of Hotch laughing, _at least_.

Reid just stares, not reacting to the shouting, which Morgan is relieved by. He knows Reid can be insecure, and no matter what it's not right to shout at him. The pretty boy hasn't done anything.

"Why – why are you here?" Reid asks.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you, it wasn't fair." Morgan says, ignoring Reid's question. He'll get to that in a moment.

"Why are you here?" Reid repeats. That's when Morgan notices the slight shiver of the kid's hands. It worries him, but the kid's been through a lot in the past couple of days.

"I have to talk to you about something." Reid doesn't move an inch, nor does he make any move to.

"Can't it wait Morgan? I am kind of tired." He then rubs his eyes.

"No it can't. I'm sorry, I should let you have some rest, but I really need to tell you something." He knows it's not fair. To bring it up to Reid in a time like this, right after he just got tortured and nearly died, but he has to, because maybe this isn't the best time, but it's time.

Reid makes a slight shake of his head, seemingly thinking to himself. After a moment he steps inside, and allows Morgan to enter. "Thanks" He manages to get out. His heart is beating. Fast.

"So what is it?" Reid asks, as soon as they're in the kitchen.

Morgan sighs. This is it; he is going to tell the man he loves the truth. And he is going to do it right now, before he chickens out.

"I fucking love you Spencer Reid."

If Spencer had been holding anything, he defiantly would have dropped it. "W-what?"

"I love you. Okay?"

"It's not funny Morgan." His words are dripping with anger and their eyes meets. Morgan has never seen Reid angry, and certainly not this angry. It's as if his eyes are on fire. "It's not funny at all! How can you even-? You know what, I don't even care! I've just been through – through hell, that's what I've been, and I know you saw me on the camera, but that doesn't mean you saw everything – doesn't mean you understand-!" Morgan cuts him off.

"What do you mean, we didn't see everything?" That's when Morgan gets that feeling, the feeling of dread running through him. He doesn't want to know, afraid of what the answer can be, but he _has_ to know. It's Reid for gods sake.

Reid seems flustered. As if he just said something, he had absolutely no intentions of saying.

"I mean, there were times when the camera was off." He's dodging the real question, saying the truth, but not really. There's something there.

"Yeah, but what happened during those times?"

"Nothing, I just meant-"

"Reid, what happened?"

Reid shakes his head.

"Nothing" He says again, but he is whispering this time and he's almost hugging himself. His eyes, which are now stuck to the floor, seem to be getting wetter. Or it could just be Morgan imagining things, but he's pretty sure he isn't.

"Spencer, tell me." At the sound of his first name, Spencer looks up. Morgan was right about the eyes. They are completely glassy. A tear trickles down the genius's nose.

Then he disappears from the room. Morgan just waits for him to come back. He's not really sure what to do, so just staying behind seems like the best idea.

After about 5 minutes he emerges in the kitchen again. In his hands he has two bottles, one of which he thrust up into Morgan's face.

The description clearly reads "Hydromorphone"

"Also known as Dilaudid, dihydromorphinone orpalladone. I took them from Tobias. I stole them from a dead man, Morgan!"

Reid cries. Something falls into place in Morgan's head.

"He – he gave you injections?"

Reid nods, his red eyes dancing around the room.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Morgan is scared of his own voice. It's been a long time – a _very_ long time – since he's heard it sound so vulnerable. So breakable.

Why didn't he notice?

Reid doesn't answer, but Morgan didn't expect him to. That's the sort of question that any profiler, with respect for himself, should be able to answer.

"I do. I _do_ love you Reid, man, that wasn't a joke" And red-eyed, shivering and shaking, crying Reid whom he should have protected from the claws of Tobias Hankel looks up at him, with a big question mark on his face.

So Morgan kisses him. He closes his eyes, and slowly places his lips on Spencer's. Then he moves them softly, but still taking in as much of Spencer as possible. He just wants time to stand still, and love Spencer forever. But it doesn't.

Spencer's warm lips is completely still as a statue under him, and as much as Derek wants to continue with the kissing it's wrong. The only reason Spencer hasn't pushed him away yet, is probably that the genius is in complete shock. That, and maybe the fact that Spencer has just trusted him with something really intimate, and what does Derek do? He kisses him, because that's what he wants to. He takes advantage of someone who's – _oh_ _shit_ – on drugs, and completely vulnerable.

That's when he drags away. "I'm sorry" He whispers to Reid, who has no expression on his face whatsoever. Except for the tears.

"Get out, Morgan. Get out!" Pretty boy is screaming at him.

Derek can't move. That's when Spencer pushes him. It's not an extremely hard push, but Morgan is still sure that Spencer is using all his forces.

"Out!" He yells, and at last, his feet are cooperating. Reid pushes him one more time, and then, somehow, at some point, he's out on the street in front of the building with Reid's apartment. His heart aches.

But he doesn't go back to Reid.


End file.
